tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-23400750.post7708870195516277563..comments2023-11-03T11:32:01.540+00:00Comments on Thought Experiments : The Blog: Don't Fight, TedBryan Appleyardhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08276787058430388582noreply@blogger.comBlogger19125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-23400750.post-46071893878846386912008-06-01T11:47:00.000+00:002008-06-01T11:47:00.000+00:00This comports with a basic difference between Amer...This comports with a basic difference between Americans and Brits which I think it was John Derbyshire pointed out. Americans aren't stoic. We don't do the "stiff upper lip". We fight everything.Duckhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08852569465893563139noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-23400750.post-49287571609982582102008-05-28T03:52:00.000+00:002008-05-28T03:52:00.000+00:00Remarkable. My first visit to your blog, and here ...Remarkable. My first visit to your blog, and here you have so succinctly described exactly my feelings about this matter while I was receiving treatment for breast cancer four years ago. I never felt like I was "fighting" it. I certainly cooperated with my doctors and fervently hoped and prayed for the best, but my inner response to the experience was much more that of submission, of wanting to Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-23400750.post-4350618796547923972008-05-27T23:05:00.000+00:002008-05-27T23:05:00.000+00:00I read that last interview with Nuala and was fill...I read that last interview with Nuala and was filled with regret. I had a chance to meet her -- I reviewed her book, "Chicago May," a couple years back -- when she came to Phila. on the book tour. In fact, she asked for me in the audience (a colleague was there who told her he knew me, but I was at work). Indeed, that is where I was. Instead of going to hear her speak at the Union League, I took Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-23400750.post-35024950973932084602008-05-27T21:45:00.000+00:002008-05-27T21:45:00.000+00:00One way or the other, facing death is the ultimate...One way or the other, facing death is the ultimate challenge. How one approaches it is a matter of character. For some, this may amount to a 'fight'; to others, a lost cause. Either way, it is surely the worst of times. I wept recently while listening to Nuala O'Faolain, an Irish journalist and writer, when she spoke on radio of her utter despair and devastation upon discovering she had not long Neil Forsythhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00240393170374161007noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-23400750.post-82077830112818629322008-05-27T19:25:00.000+00:002008-05-27T19:25:00.000+00:00Sen. Ted Kennedy is always said to be 'fighting' h...<I>Sen. Ted Kennedy is always said to be 'fighting' his cancer.</I><BR/><BR/>Really? He is "always" said to be fighting? Are you saying that no matter where I look or for how long I will find nothing written about Ted Kennedy's cancer that does not say he is fighting it? Or were you using a bit of hyperbole, perhaps? Such as what people may be saying when they talk about "fighting" cancer, Tom P.https://www.blogger.com/profile/05638283790763940692noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-23400750.post-73396383992246567442008-05-27T16:51:00.000+00:002008-05-27T16:51:00.000+00:00Malty wrote: "we are at the mercy of the NHS walli...<I>Malty wrote: "we are at the mercy of the NHS wallies, would you trust the doctors diagnosis enough to accept it and pack in ? I bet you wouldn't."</I><BR/><BR/>The NHS as an entity may be chaotic (largely thanks to political interference) but there are still plenty of outstanding men and women who work in it. If it wasn't for them, I'd be in a wheelchair by now thanks to one of those ailments Markhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06074816573442173758noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-23400750.post-55518606405484083422008-05-27T16:26:00.000+00:002008-05-27T16:26:00.000+00:00Susan, I will read the book, sounds typically porr...Susan, I will read the book, sounds typically porridge scofferish, that character, Teddy boy was out on his yacht today, perhaps looking for his Chappequidic. The comments suprise me somewhat, living in the UK (and unless you can afford private medicine,) we are at the mercy of the NHS wallies, would you trust the doctors diagnosis enough to accept it and pack in ? I bet you wouldn't.maltyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02936465848907794425noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-23400750.post-38904770470749709902008-05-27T15:00:00.000+00:002008-05-27T15:00:00.000+00:00Much as I admire people who react bravely when the...Much as I admire people who react bravely when they contract a potentially fatal illness, you've got to be careful with the claims you make about 'battling' and it being a 'choice'.<BR/><BR/>The insidious flipside is that people who die did so because of a character flaw. <BR/><BR/>But countless brave people die every day.Brithttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00390560583798960760noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-23400750.post-63232474410982843522008-05-27T14:49:00.000+00:002008-05-27T14:49:00.000+00:00And Malty, a short novel I bet you'd love, Peter P...And Malty, a short novel I bet you'd love, Peter Pouncey's "Rules for Old Men Waiting." Man's wife has died, he intends to soon follow, but first he's going to write a little novel set in the WW I trenches, drink some good booze, and listen to some great music. Oh, yeah -- and he's snowed into his Cape Cod house. He's a Scot, btw, and formative years were spent in the Highlands -- great scenes ofAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-23400750.post-774996397092594802008-05-27T14:40:00.000+00:002008-05-27T14:40:00.000+00:00"Do not go gently into that great good night." Som..."Do not go gently into that great good night." Some people give up right away, other people don't. It's a choice. If you've known anyone dying, you'd have seen one variant or the other.<BR/><BR/>Personally, I recommend you read John Banville's "The Sea."<BR/><BR/>Hear, hear, Randy. I knew there was a reason I esteemed you so, beyond your trenchant commentary here.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-23400750.post-45935672442974645622008-05-27T13:23:00.000+00:002008-05-27T13:23:00.000+00:00I disagree, but then I was diagnosed with an invar...I disagree, but then I was diagnosed with an invariably fatal disease that, by all accounts, should have terminated my presence on earth almost 20 years ago. I don't pretend that I've struggled or fought against the disease, but I didn't sit around assuming a passive position of "dignity and serenity in the face of death." What you or others think of my subsequent behavior is of no great interestRandyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03071928294799081845noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-23400750.post-75182586039717926852008-05-27T11:50:00.000+00:002008-05-27T11:50:00.000+00:00Excellent--how is it possible to evade this logic....Excellent--how is it possible to evade this logic. You are truly rare in being able to write sensibly about death.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-23400750.post-18624490874638310652008-05-27T11:34:00.000+00:002008-05-27T11:34:00.000+00:00There does seem to be false dichotomy involved in ...There does seem to be false dichotomy involved in the belief that not fighting is giving in Surrendering. Being steamrollered, etc.. No, far better to accept. Accept that death is natural. That it comes, we know not when, but as a thief in the night. To serenely accept and understand one's fate and deal with it accordingly is a more dignified way to depart this life than raging and fighting.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-23400750.post-2834255745775522942008-05-27T10:12:00.000+00:002008-05-27T10:12:00.000+00:00The 'fighting' idea is for the benefit of the surv...The 'fighting' idea is for the benefit of the surviving relatives, not the patient himself.<BR/><BR/>Funerals are for the benefit of the living, not the dead.Brithttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00390560583798960760noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-23400750.post-5633918167277226742008-05-27T09:32:00.000+00:002008-05-27T09:32:00.000+00:00Spot on, Bryan. I once read about some research t...Spot on, Bryan. I once read about some research that showed total denial was as effective as treatment in some kinds of cancer (in terms of survival rate).Nigehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13314891387515045404noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-23400750.post-51854393293284434562008-05-27T09:30:00.000+00:002008-05-27T09:30:00.000+00:00Methinks there is also an attitude that is both co...Methinks there is also an attitude that is both combative and serene - as in the Battle of Maldon or the Finnish Winter War, one knows one has no chance but fights anyway, for the sake of it. It's not a blind, stupefied rage, it's more a matter of not giving an inch.<BR/><BR/>In cinema we see this in Predator where Billy (the huge Native American) stops fleeing the predator and stands on the log Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-23400750.post-5690776203898910902008-05-27T09:13:00.000+00:002008-05-27T09:13:00.000+00:00what are you talking about! if you were in his pla...what are you talking about! if you were in his place would you 'fight' it or give in? a good state of mind is a virtue at any time. Anyway, it's just men's-talk for ''I am really so sorry, dear!''Ian russellhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11106519805045337505noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-23400750.post-71088977033984587732008-05-27T08:48:00.000+00:002008-05-27T08:48:00.000+00:00There are many instances of a wife or husband dyin...There are many instances of a wife or husband dying, having been together for many years, followed very quickly by the partner, giving up the will to live ?, it may exist, this will to live. Placebos are thought to work, why ?maltyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02936465848907794425noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-23400750.post-28436215963955977402008-05-27T07:21:00.000+00:002008-05-27T07:21:00.000+00:00Surely it's all part of our old and superstitious ...Surely it's all part of our old and superstitious tendency to demonize serious illness and see it as something exterior to ourselves, especially when it is poorly understood. Feeling punchy raises the spirits and may well help to raise the immune system - depression is known to lower it. And some punchiness is necessary, to get the best treatment (especially in the NHS lottery), to discourage Markhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06074816573442173758noreply@blogger.com