Dear Nick,
Yes.
Of course, I am not sure which Sunday newspapers you are talking about, but I assume you are referring to the political commentaries in the 'heavies' in which case you are, I'm afraid, a pervert and, if you have a shred of decency, you should sign the Political Offenders Register at once. But take heart, though your condition is both incurable and terminal, it is not serious. Many, perhaps most, people around the world suffer from the same affliction and seem to lead otherwise normal lives, restricting their Sarahphilia to no more than ten or twelve hours a day in front of the computer, lapping up Wired, Andrew Sullivan, Maureen Dowd, assorted feminists, Barack Obama, The Onion and a respectable slice of the 17 million Google results now generated by the Arctic Fox. You probably find yourself turning over and over in your mind intriguing details like the effect of Moose Killer on spectacle sales. I hope at least you have not sunk so low as to toy with your Photoshop. All I can suggest is that you eat your five portions of fruit and veg a day and set aside some 'Nick not Sarah time' in your local sensory deprivation chamber. But, if succumb you must, I hear the Agate Inn is quite nice. And, remember, I'm listening.
Caringly yours,
'Agony' Appleyard.
A blog about, among other things, imaginary ideas - What ifs? and Imagine thats. What if photographs looked nothing like what we see with our eyes? Imagine that the Berlin Wall had never come down. What if we were the punchline of an interminable joke? All contributions welcome.
Another promising talk show idea, surely? If your forthcoming show is about 45 minutes long you could easily fit a 10 minute Agony Appleyard slot in somewhere...dispensing consolation to folk ranging from Jade Goody to whoever loses the Presidential thing this year.
ReplyDeleteNige has the perfect antidote to this affliction and many others too: Dubonnet. It seems you will live to be 100 and your cares will just fall away.
ReplyDeleteAs she is an altogether tidy piece of totty the obsession is not especially unhealthy. One should worry, however, were it to be Hattie Jacques.
ReplyDeleteOr Polly.
Let's not forget, this is the same "piece of totty" who has flippantly opined that she would attack Russia over the Georgia issue. Call me straight-laced if you will, but I find the threat of nuclear war a real turn-off.
ReplyDeleteNeil, I share your concern about Palin's apparent endorsement of Barack Obama's official position WRT Georgia and the Unkraine.
ReplyDeleteRandy could we have some links please to sources verifying that Obama would go to war with Russia in response to an attack on Georgia.
ReplyDeletePalin and Obama do agree though on Afghanistan (and with the Bush administration but disagreeing with McCain who thinks it is dangerously naive) about whether the US should be carrying out cross-border attacks on militants in Pakistan.
Chris, I made no such claim so I shall not be providing you with any references. If you and Neil wish to highlight part of one sentence of Palin's interview out of context, that's your right. The fact remains, however, that Obama's position WRT Georgia and Ukraine obtaining NATO membership is virtually identical to McCain's. The choice confronting Americans on November 4 is between John McCain and Barack Obama. Sarah Palin and Joe Biden are side shows. Otherwise, we'd be involved in serious discussion of the Biden Plan for the partition of Iraq into three separate countries.
ReplyDeleteCome to think of it, last nights C4 noos featured a "discussion" with, among others, PT. Crushing Uhuru Murphy was giving her the seriously interested once, or twice over, must have been the jacket.
ReplyDeleteWhat if.
Speaking of Georgia/Russia as I recall it, St. Obama was going to sort out the Georgia situation via the United Nations. Then someone informed him that Russia had veto power on the Security Council. Oops! It was a day or so later that he started parroting John McCain.
ReplyDeleteI was watching the Palin interview the other night and almost ripped my cock off. I almost complained to the BBC.
ReplyDeleteChuck...get help. I just saw her interview with ABC and I'm truly scared. This is starting to feel like the end of days. Retards in the white house, retards besieging the white house, chippy Russians, imperious China, capitalism collapsing, Gordon Goon shuffling paperclips...but still, Bryan's eclectic erudition says there is still hope.
ReplyDeletePolitics aside. Conservatives are without doubt more humpable. I mean for ffs, it must be a joy to go to bed with a Guardian reader, you probably have to be vetted and sign a contract first, there is something wonderfully exploitative about sex, as too food. God only knows the delights of a veterinarian Guardian reader.
ReplyDelete