Monday, March 26, 2007
On Not Being Poisoned
We will soon, it seems, have a dipstick to test our food for poisons. This particular anxiety was, of course, created by the 'sell-by' or 'best before' dates stamped on supermarket food. These are such weasel words - why not just 'fatal after...'? I don't need the dipstick, of course, as I have Hans, my vertically-challenged taster who has been with me since childhood and who, when he is not vomiting, plays an excellent game of chess. For Steve McLaren, however, the dipstick will be a godsend.
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A blog about, among other things, imaginary ideas - What ifs? and Imagine thats. What if photographs looked nothing like what we see with our eyes? Imagine that the Berlin Wall had never come down. What if we were the punchline of an interminable joke? All contributions welcome.
Which explains the Max Bygraves song, 'You need Hans...'
ReplyDeleteI think the fans already think that Steve McLaren is a dipstick.
ReplyDeleteQuite, Chippy, but I've never been sure what dipstick means as an insult
ReplyDeletePerhaps it's short for 'conjugal dipstick'.
ReplyDeleteMost of these work just fine in the context of McLaren. I find number six the most satisfying; swiftly followed by seven.
ReplyDeleteYou beat me to it, Johnny. But why is it always the seventh definition that frightens me the most?
ReplyDeleteMight it be because of this, Chippy?
ReplyDeleteOh no!
ReplyDeleteI'd now like to known as Chip.
Just don't eat gravy cuts of cat- or dogfood in the U.S. for the next few months or you *will* be poisoned.
ReplyDelete