Wednesday, March 26, 2008

Oi, Darling - You're Barred!

This seems to me to be an excellent idea (and Moe - just say No). We should all get behind it - but don't go mistaking the similarly pied Bryan for wee Alistair (as if). And meanwhile, another entirely arbitrary revision of these so-called 'guidelines' - just to make it very clear to everyone who's in charge (i.e. the wowsers).


  1. Nige,
    "NICE deputy chief executive Dr Gillian Leng said people, and in particular women, were drinking more and the NHS advisory body wanted to send a "clear message".

    That would be the same as this clear message then....

    "Arbeit macht frie"

    At least you had to catch a train to read that one.

  2. You mean the black eyebrows and delightfully silver hair - good lord you're right!

  3. Interesting comment on NICE in there:

    "... It brings NICE in line with government advice and replaces previous guidance saying small daily amounts were fine.

    However, NICE concedes there is no evidence to support the change ..."

    Don't look entirely objective do they?

  4. Could not this excellent 'initiative' be extended to a blanket ban on all Nu Labour politicians entering any shop, bar, taxi, hairdressers, library, police station, hospital, indeed from having anything to do with the human race?

  5. Perhaps we could avoid all this by the creation of a new Cabinet post called Chief Maggot (or possibly "Lowly Worm"). The Chief Maggot's job would be to take all the heat. He or she would be forbidden to use the usual rules of libel and slander, so vox pop could be as rude as it liked. The CM would be obliged by law only to appear at spectacular cock-ups, with speeches limited to absolutely pathetic initiatives that stand no chance of success, transparently insincere apologies and feeble excuses.

    To begin with - and why not begin at the bottom - the CM could take over handling all health and safety announcements. Then we might see how absurd so many of them are. I mean, if it's bad to drink during pregnancy as NICE suggest, then it's always been bad. Presumably so even when the choice was between water laced with alcohol and water laced with dysentery. So how come we're all reading this stuff today?

  6. Nice idea, Mark - I think Brown has Darling lined up for precisely this post. He's perfect for it.

  7. I note that Cameron drinks in all the right pubs these days!

  8. Why just Alistair Darling? If every pub barring Darling had posters barring local Labour politucians as well it would certainly put the pressure on Darling from them as they get criticised locally for supporting this.

    Believe me. There's one thing that will make politicians put pressure on their bosses. It's local criticism of themselves and the threat of losing their seats.