Monday, May 28, 2007
Mrs Noah in Lesbian Snake Handling Shock with Veep
I don't know, maybe that Dawkins chappie has a point. I am deluged this morning with news from the ultra-bonkers wing of American religion. The most deliriously entertaining item comes from the Pandagon blog, which, when not written by Jeffrey Archer's future squeeze, Amanda Marcotte, can emit some good stuff. This vid is a joy, if a disturbing one. Good ol' boy Fred Phelps brings hellfire down on the Cheneys - 'these two old fools who are holding dyke daughter Mary's newborn bastard son and pretending to like it.' Fred - 'God hates America. America is doomed' - is a fine example of that strange phenomenon - American anti-Americanism. Meanwhile, at the Creation Museum in Kentucky, you can see relieved dinosaurs peering out of the windows of Noah's Ark. 'Sure beats the hell out of extinction,' says one grateful brontosaurus from Cleveland. New research among ten per cent of Americans tells us that Noah's wife was Joan of Ark, hitherto thought to have been a lady from France, the one country God hates more than America. The book that reveals this makes the point that, though the US is the most religious nation in the developed world, it also appears to be the most ignorant about religion. Brian's Bible Pronunciation Biblical Pronouncing Website has been nominated by some as the worst web site in the world. It's certainly the most Zen as every link brings you back to the same place. And, finally, a brand new American faith - relationships - is brilliantly represented by Lloyd on Ofuzi - 'You've got a gripe, let's hear it.' Lloyd is in search of 'an unstable woman for a drama-filled relationship'. I especially like his stipulations that she must 'drink to forget', a course of action that never, in my experience, works, and that she should have 'undergone negative psychiatric evaluations in the past.' I know, I know, weird America is an easy target, but it is Bank Holiday Monday and it hasn't stopped raining for decades.
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A blog about, among other things, imaginary ideas - What ifs? and Imagine thats. What if photographs looked nothing like what we see with our eyes? Imagine that the Berlin Wall had never come down. What if we were the punchline of an interminable joke? All contributions welcome.
Since the Mrs Noah line is a joke from "Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure" (one of the great movies) I suspect this statistic is one of the 83% that are invented. I wonder how many British schoolchildren could explain the religious significance of today's holiday?
ReplyDeleteGood point, John, and thanks for the info on the origin of Mrs Ark. But are you sure 83 per cent of statistics are invented? Some say it is 74 per cent likely the figure is closed to 93 per cent.
ReplyDeleteMy son has been listening to Marley's "Buffalo Soldiers" all morning, so all I can say is "Ai yi yi yuh yiyiyiyiyi."
ReplyDelete"The book that reveals this makes the point that, though the US is the most religious nation in the developed world, it also appears to be the most ignorant about religion."
ReplyDeleteOf course! Actually reading the Bible is a risk factor for unbelief.
"Lloyd is in search of 'an unstable woman for a drama-filled relationship'. I especially like his stipulations that she must 'drink to forget', a course of action that never, in my experience, works"
You've obviously never applied yourself to the task with enough resolution.
Duck, I think men are able to drink to forget. Women, however, are not. In fact, drinking has the opposite effect on them. Boozy, late night arguments with my wife have provided me with ample evidence of this - I can't remember my name, yet she can remember...well... lots of things I'd rather forget.
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