Tuesday, April 01, 2008
Blog in Boring Crisis
My wife emails me - she is six feet away, but doors can be such a nuisance - to tell me my blog is getting boring. I am at a loss. Is it possible to burn blogs as overwrought poets and novelists used to burn manuscripts? I must look into this.
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A blog about, among other things, imaginary ideas - What ifs? and Imagine thats. What if photographs looked nothing like what we see with our eyes? Imagine that the Berlin Wall had never come down. What if we were the punchline of an interminable joke? All contributions welcome.
april fool.
ReplyDeleteAh, hadn't thought of that
ReplyDeleteConsider yourself lucky Bryan, my wife tries to mail me.
ReplyDeleteI am pretty sure its not boring at all Mr B! I find most of it quite interesting myself....
ReplyDeleteFirst rule of blogging (or indeed life) - ignore the missus.
ReplyDeletei think it's time for Dark Bryan to emerge. Dark Bryan will have no restraint. Dark Bryan will be like Will Graham from 'Manhunter', dressing in pastel shades, slamming rival journalists into car windscreens while hissing "you stay the hell away from me!", calling people 'sport', 'pal', and 'my man'. He will have scars. He will disturb people with his insights into psychopathology. He will have sudden flashes of intuition and in polite company slam his fist down, shouting out "you took your gloves off to touch her, didn't you? Didn't you, you son of a bitch?" - also he will be accompanied by a constant soundtrack of great 80s music.
ReplyDeleteMrs Thought Experiments will fear for Dark Bryan's sanity but also she will acknowledge his unboringness and bright 80s clothes.
I think the missus has a point. I've just looked back at the blog postings of April 2007 and there is some wonderful stuff; fresh, feisty, full of wit, thought provoking, never boring, all delivered with great consistency of quality. But in recent weeks, it's felt like watching a great engine slowly running down, losing momentum. I remember Ian Russell suggesting that blogging was just another passing fad. In the case of this blog, I hope Ian is wrong.
ReplyDeleteEvery one is being very rude today - he is trying his best you know. As my old mum used to say - if you don't have something nice to say best say nothing...
ReplyDeleteUh-oh, the blogger's dark night of the soul. Steady on, there. One of the very best blogs, Bryan, but if you will allow the perspective of a colonial from across the pond, in addition to praying you might consider giving the serious a bit more time. That's why the Americans are so good at this game--they take everything deadly seriously and their staying power is astounding. Just as Monty Python was best savoured irregularly in small doses, so over-exposure to the famous English wit and irony can become an addiction offering diminishing highs, no?
ReplyDeleteMy humble suggestion is that Nige's delightful, quixotic posts on birds and churches and whatever be interspersed with some serious controversy to get the juices of us intellectually-minded losers flowing with the morning java. Here are some timeless, failsafe suggestions:
A)religion vs science;
B)science vs religion;
C)why there is absolutely no conflict between religion and science;
D) George W Bush--Saviour of the West;
E) The superior vitality and resilience of American culture;
F)Climate change--scientific error or religious crock?
G) How to stop the lower classes from drinking so much while the rest of us tipple away at will;
H)The French--why do such revolting people do so much so well?
I) Britain-in-Europe--how to stop the slide, chapter 25,394.
J) Divorce, crime, porn, violence--why they are all self-correcting and there is no reason to worry.
K) Islam--religion of peace, hummus and traditional family values;
L) Soccer--how to build a "great game" on corruption, racism and thuggery.
Standing by with my double expresso.
oo-er, did I say that, johntyh? thought is a passing fad. memory is a fading past. all things come to an end. I know that allotments are the new fad - you can't get one for love nor money! soon there will be inner city protest marches, the common man (and woman) demanding his strip of land under the allotments act, 1950. it is their basic human right to produce their own green-grocery! they are going to replace Britannia on the 50p piece with an image of a man under a cloth cap, leaning on a fork.
ReplyDeleteIs it possible to burn blogs...
ReplyDeleteAn idea there for a website where you could enter a url and watch the relevant page burn or be eaten by hellish caterpillars, or absorbed by jeffreyarcher.com... Only for fun of course as The Provider won't let any of that happen for real, especially the last one. Doesn't like rivals.
Blog burning can easily be arranged. Not that I'd recommend it, though.
ReplyDeleteMaybe you need a break? Elberry should fetch a good price on ebay. Sell him - "Will not post outside UK, no scammers from Romania or Nigeria" - and head for the sun for a couple of weeks. And I'm sure Nige would welcome the opportunity to leave his new laptop and get to grips with the cormorant problem in the Surrey Hills. While you're away you could always get someone in to be a "blog-sitter" for you.
ReplyDeleteThere must be, somewhere out there, used blog dealerships, the servers wearing suede coats and muttering "good little tool this, one owner, no porn, only 1200 comments on the clock"
ReplyDeleteWell, in a long marriage you've got everything from ecstasy to boredom. I believe "this too shall pass." Further, I'm not bored, though I do want to know if someone sabotaged British Airways and that's why that new Heathrow terminal is SO screwed up. Can you get to the bottom of it?
ReplyDeleteNot an original idea it seems...
ReplyDeletehttp://www.destroysites.com/
It gets a bit boring though, even for a Thought Experimenter.
Oh Bryan, that you should be so callow in the ways of marriage.
ReplyDeleteIf women know anything about men, and they certainly understand us better than we do them, they know men can't stand to be considered 'boring'.
- Lazy? Fine.
- Irresponsible? Hey, I'm a crazy kinda guy, society ain't going to tie me down.
- Ugly? Yeah, but look at the beauty of my mind.
- etc., etc.....
But being called boring translates in the mind of the male to: " I think I've probably got all the value I can out of this one. That fellow over there,on the other hand, with the devil-may-care dress style, insouciant smile and well-thumbed copy of Rimbaud in his pocket, looks kind of interesting. Hmmm?"
She's putting you to your mettle. Tighten the girth and charge forth.
Susan, BA haven`t been sabotaged, they have always been like that, met this bloke once, said he was "in charge of BAs in flight catering", must have been before they farmed it out, then he ran "lost luggage", this bloke couldn`t have organised a bonk in a brothel.
ReplyDeleteMalty family in the fortunate position of being able to fly German Wings, although budget, vastly superior to BA.
Sheesh, what a funny, disturbing, mad and invigorating set of responses. I am as it happens about to take a break, sort of, as I shall be, as we say, on the road. It's probably what I need. It's probably what you need.
ReplyDeleteCan i suggest entrusting your password to me in your absence? i could post my usual sensitive & liberal thoughts under your name, you might come back to find you have new fans.
ReplyDeleteStrange times indeed - best that a blog never pauses to examine itself, I suspect. I'll probably post a bit in yr absence, Bryan - maybe even wrenching myself clear of the gravitational pull of birds, churches and Surrey suburbia... Chin up chin up, you don't really have a problem (as the Jayhawks put it on the title track of the excellent album Smile).
ReplyDeleteNige,
ReplyDeleteLooking forward to a really good twitter while the cats away.
Malty, you are a funny boy. But I've always had good experiences traveling in Britain, especially on the railways, and never a problem with Heathrow. It's just unbelievable B.A. could tout this new terminal and then screw it up so badly. That's why I keep thinking there's some other agency at work.
ReplyDeleteBryan, have fun. I know, in fact, that you are certain to have a spiritual deepening on your journey(and I'm not even Selena Dreamy -- though I think Elberry is)....
i wish i was, Susan. i don't have the ankles for the job, trust me. i also don't have the time to do 2 blogs at once!
ReplyDeleteSo you don't fancy being his neal cassady, nige?! good to hear it! I'm looking forward to the scroll downs and nature-watch.
ReplyDeleteSusan, BA's recent difficulties might have something to do with the fact some Irish bloke is running the show. Perhaps if the Brits hadn't holidayed in Ireland for 800 years on the trot we might be trying a bit harder now to assist them with their travel plans.
ReplyDeleteYou wife is wrong. Why doesn't she try a post or two herself?
ReplyDeleteI suggest you spice things up by posting about Max Mosley. Today he says spoke in German during a sado-masochistic orgy not because he was fantasising about being a Nazi but because several of the prostitutes were German speakers. What a guy. Alan Clark for petrolheads. That type of thing'll keep the punters interested. Well, me at any rate.
ReplyDelete