Monday, September 10, 2007

The Alien Abduction Caption

Posted by Bryan Appleyard at 7:20 am

25 comments:

  1. Ian russellSeptember 10, 2007 8:10 am

    Spot the One-legged Surfer Dude Competition.

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  2. Ian russellSeptember 10, 2007 8:13 am

    Bryan Appleyard Celebrates The Opening of His New Hall Carpet.

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  3. Ian russellSeptember 10, 2007 8:15 am

    Odour-Eaters - the original carbon footprints.

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  4. James HighamSeptember 10, 2007 8:34 am

    Right, well where did they leave the skirts and knickers?

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  5. Ian russellSeptember 10, 2007 8:35 am

    Cobblers To Cobbling: After Interviewing The Last Celebrity On Earth, Bryan Had To Eke Out A Living Repairing Neighbours' Shoes.

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  6. NigeSeptember 10, 2007 8:51 am

    Ah, the greatest closing line in TV comedy...

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  7. Ian russellSeptember 10, 2007 8:55 am

    The Podophobics Self-Help Group meetings got off to a disasterous start...

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  8. Ian russellSeptember 10, 2007 9:01 am

    Sandie Shaw Appreciation Society attempts to recruit younger generation.

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  9. anthonynorthSeptember 10, 2007 9:08 am

    This is because they're not called 'brothel creepers' any more.

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  10. Ian russellSeptember 10, 2007 9:10 am

    Come VAT time, the Appleyard's wished they'd bought Bryan that calculator for his birthday.

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  11. Ian russellSeptember 10, 2007 9:13 am

    (oops, errant apostrophe)

    Norfolk village roots out devil's spawn in annual toe count.

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  12. John HalliwellSeptember 10, 2007 9:15 am

    DCI Spencer, the Yard's expert on UFOs, reports '8 kids taken, 5 hiding under the bed, and 6 wearing crocs told to "bugger off"

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  13. Ian russellSeptember 10, 2007 9:34 am

    Portugese detectives turn efforts to searching shoes after McCanns visit Nike factory to increase public awareness.

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  14. Ian russellSeptember 10, 2007 9:51 am

    ''...as soon as Richard Reid gets here, we can begin the firework display.''

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  15. Ian russellSeptember 10, 2007 9:56 am

    After hearing of Naipaul's gift of a hat, Salman Rushdie tries one better.

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  16. Dysania FizgigSeptember 10, 2007 10:14 am

    " Calling Occupants Of Interplanetary Clarks "

    pp,
    Karen & Richard Carpenter.

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  17. John HalliwellSeptember 10, 2007 12:09 pm

    'Latest delivery to Ian Russell as Caption Society of Great Britain carries out urgent review of policy that awards one pair of shoes for every ten postings'

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  18. AnonymousSeptember 10, 2007 2:14 pm

    Ian, your skills continue unabated! Love the Rushdie/Naipaul one. Of course, you're scaring the mediocre caption writers -- like me -- off, but s'okay. It's fun to watch you at play.

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  19. simbnSeptember 10, 2007 2:32 pm

    'The abandoned shoes arrive at Dr Scholl's, but he refuses to turn them into heelys.'

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  20. MarkSeptember 10, 2007 2:44 pm

    Undercover cop was Slipper of the Yard

    Aliens "absolutely legless" claim abductees

    National Society of Amnesiacs stumped: unable to return forgotten shoes as can't recall who its members are

    "We can't go on meeting like this - I feel such a heel"
    "I love it when you let your laces down and look all soulful"

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  21. Ian russellSeptember 10, 2007 2:56 pm

    surely not, Susan! I will give it a rest then. I only do it because I can't afford one of those brain gym gadgets that Nicole Kidman advertises - you know the ones? I think they're dangerous anyway.

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  22. JohnnySeptember 10, 2007 3:14 pm

    Ian, Brain Training is a fine distraction; compelling and moreish - though, disappointingly, it does not rate caption-writing prowess.

    As an aside, I note that Nintendo's advertising campaign appears to be hitting its target.

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  23. AnonymousSeptember 10, 2007 3:26 pm

    Ian, don't stop! I think they're hilarious and your captions raise the game for the other contenders.

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  24. Gordon McCabeSeptember 10, 2007 5:40 pm

    Health and Safety Executive warn of the dangers of stepping on cracks in the pavement.

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  25. AnonymousNovember 03, 2008 5:50 am

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    ReplyDelete

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