Wednesday, August 01, 2007

The Madeley Hoax

Looks like it's not one half of Richard & Judy after all. Last night this came in: 

'I understand that there is no higher privilege than being accorded a link on your site but I feel I must warn you that there are dark forces at work and people may soon denounce me and say that I'm not who I claim to be. I don't understand it myself but there you go. We great men must share these perils of greatness.
I just want you to know that I appreciate the faith you've shown in me and, by all that's Znarg and holy, I will work to justify my election to such a high blogroll.
Cordial thanks,
Dick

32 comments:

  1. I assumed you were in on the hoax. If that was Madeley, then Edwina Currie is Edwina Currie. Is your pretence that you were hoaxed a hoax? Now I'm very confused. Also, is it illegal to pretend to be a celebrity on blogger, or is it too trivial?

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  2. No, not I, Brit. The blog is such an elaborate product and so wildly well written that I couldn't imagine a hoaxer going to such trouble. But things were a bit frenetic yesterday so perhaps I wasn't paying attention.

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  3. I think Dick's note shows great manners, sensitivity and - dare I say it - breeding. If that's how they do things on Znarg I like it.

    Anyway I still love his blog, with its random polar bear facts.

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  4. Madeley's blog - if that is what it is, and it would seem it isn't - reveals him to be a lover of the cravat (of which I recently asked, Is it too late?). It's getting weirder and weirder...

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  5. Every blog needs a Richard Madeley. You have chosen an excellent one: why put up with inferior imitations when only the best will do? No one is perfect, and if this particular Richard Madeley has a tendency to try to breast-feed garden gnomes after a few glasses of wine, well it's not that much less bizarre than the Richard & Judy show itself. You could do a lot worse than keep him, imho.

    In addition to being a lover of the cravat, this Richard also has some sharp observations on killer squirrels. I'm wondering whether this might not be a double bluff of a hoax, and that Bryan or Nige are behind it all.

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  6. wtf. I'm not sure who's pulling who's plonker. lol.

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  7. I'm beginning to think we are. Perhaps I blog in my sleep as R Madeley or, of course, as Bryan Appleyard and RM is the real me. Nige and I have always had reality issues.

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  8. I suppose one way to confirm it is'nt the real RM is to provoke him into another discussion on this blog and wait for him to make the fatal mistake of posting between 5.00pm and 6.00pm Monday to Friday.

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  9. The only certainty, Brian, is that I'm not him. By the way, I've just had a thought (to that RM would say "Good God, a miracle has occured!): I think his intrusion into your Blog is part of a ratcheting-up of his profile, a reminder to ITV bosses that Parky's retirement has left a hole that only one person could possibly fill (it's not filled, is it?). Can you imagine it, the first ever interview programme where each guest is seen only when entering the set and when departing; for the guest the rest is pure audio. The camera is fixed on RM for the duration. He'd insist on it. But, hey, all prejudice aside, and that's very difficult, he'd be brilliant.

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  10. Keep the man firmly on the blogroll - he is an utter hoot.

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  11. It seems like things have got out of hand again. And I promised Judy this wouldn’t happen. Not after I danced a burlesque fandango on Tony’s dinging table at Chequers the other week.

    All I can say is if I am not me, then I’m a version of me that people seem to like almost as much as the other me. And so long as I’m not rude to my other me, but continue to like myself, playfully play me with my a loyalty to either me, then I see no reason why I should feel upset with this thing called ‘me’.

    In other words, I thank you all for your kind words of support.

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  12. Ah, so you like to dance the burlesque fandango, Richard. You're not by any chance also a lover of the black thong, are you? I think you may get on famously with Big Chip Dale.

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  13. Mark, I picked up that phrase from somewhere but I don't know where. I have read Chip's diary but if I owe him an attribution, then I'll certainly make it.

    Where is he, by the way? He's not posted in a while?

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  14. If I was Richard Madeley I'd sue Chip Dale.

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  15. oh well, if you can't beat 'em;

    I am Richard Madeley!

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  16. And I'm Richard Madeley too and so's my wife.

    Though I don't know why I've been dragged into this.

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  17. I DON'T SEE WHAT'S SO FUNNY.

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  18. My sympathies are with you, Judy. I was only saying to my wife after Dick's latest indiscretion over the lock-free bathroom " Judy's got a real handful there."

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  19. I AM A MARTYR TO HIS MADNESS.

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  20. Oh dear. I've been taken by a hox and he leads the Blogfocus this evening too, followed by Bryan. Egg on the face. Oh dear.

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  21. Plus Chip was in there too and it was such a nice Focus this time round. Do you all think that Nige is actually Bryan? This cross-naming is something I'd never descend to.

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  22. Methinks Nige protests too much.

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  23. What a reflection on the standard of intellectual debate in cyberspace when 50 odd postings over two days are about Richard and just two about Gordon; I can almost sense Bryan's despair. It feels like abuse. A lot of contributors should follow Richard's lead and take a long hard look at themselves, but without the self-hugging and kissing.

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  24. Yes, it's true. We are neglecting Gordon in all of this.

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  25. Of course, we Canadians cherish our longstanding connections with Britain and our common literary heritage, as well as our consequently keener appreciation of the irony, wit and sublimely clever subleties of English humour, especially when compared to the raw and clumsy literalism of the rapacious Yankee trader. Nonetheless, occasionally there are days when we conclude you are all quite mad and we are overwhelmed by sudden, incredibly close feelings of affinity and respect towards our good friends and neighbours to the south. This may be one of them.

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  26. HEY! Watch yourself there, Peter. We Americans from the *Southern* part of North America have rather subtle senses of humor. Look at George W. Bush. His is so subtle I bet you miss it half the time!

    So our Dick M. is a fake. Too bad. But I kinda suspected -- one figures the real Richard of Richard and Judy is too darn busy prepping for his TV show to blog as much as the "Appreciator."

    But what are the laws regarding impersonation in the UK? You sure do have some astonishing laws from this 'Merican's viewpoint. What is the deal with hauling in guys like Pete Townshend and now Chris Langham because they looked at porn on their computers? They weren't distributing it or selling it or other such with it. It seems like an invasion of privacy.

    And, that, Bryan and/or Nige (who I still think is one of Bryan's alters, 'cause we don't know his last name or what he does), I wish you'd do a post on.

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  27. I can't help wondering if the scenario depicted in 'Being John Malkovich' has actually occurred here and Richard Madeley is actually Richard madeley but is being controlled bu some down at heel puppeteer who found a little door into Richard's head on floor thirteen and a half of channel four headquarters. Far fetched, you may say, but I'm not so sure...

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  28. Alas Susan (and others), my full identity can't be revealed at present - but it certainly ain't Bryan Appleyard - nor am I Richard Havers' distant kinsman Nigel 'The Charmer' Havers. Nor, come to that, Richard Madeley. There's a photo out there somewhere - might be time to republish it...

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